Return-Path: dino@spacely.cchem.berkeley.edu
Date: Wed, 12 May 1999 16:04:11 -0700
Organization: Lizard's Lounge
X-Accept-Language: en
Subject: Yum!

Hi friends, I suppose it's been a while since I've seen most of you, and I'm never sure who Marc chats about me with. Well, I've been kinda sick for the last two months... I suppose it all started when I started eating sand. I kinda figured I'd give it a shot, and it turns out ants are actually quite a bit tastier... really... I kid lizard you not!
Actually the real story is I had a craving for calcium... all those milk and cheese commercials were getting to me, and I figured calcium was the best next thing. And anyhow Marc wouldn't share any of his smoked gouda with me ;( It's not easy being a horned lizard!
So I figured the nest best thing was dirt, right? Well, not being a chemist like my brother, I started to nibble on the sand in my cage not realizing it was pretty much pure silicon dioxide. Well, sure enough things got a bit backed up and after I stopped eating for a while Marc started to force feed me and give me this tasty calcium sugar solution(much better tasting than ants). I still didn't have an appetite for ants, and especially not for meal worms, so we went to visit Doc Harkewicz, my friendly herpetologist, about a month ago. He took an X-ray of me, and gave me some oil to help clear things up. Since then I've had almost daily warm water baths (w/o the bubbles), tummy rubs, and the occasional force feeding... argh... Oh yeah, and some of that sweet calcium/sugar stuff too. Oh and I forgot to mention my new sand; 200lbs of it fortified with calcium carbonate (thanks to the good old folks over in chemistry).
Well, today a fresh shipment of ants came in from Uncle Milty, and I just gulped down six of them critters all by myself (ya shoulda seen the expression on Marc's face when I took down the first one). Well, that was the first thing I've eaten without a fight in two months, so I though I'd drop you guys a note to let you know how I'm doing and that I'm well on my way to a full recovery. So if you are interested in chatting (e-mail is fine) or taking me for a walk some time, feel free to swing by with a leash and pooper scooper.